How trauma affects your money
Are you an entrepreneur? Have you ever wanted to up-level your income and cannot figure out why what you are doing isn’t working?
Looking back on early childhood and young adult events, I notice an underlying theme throughout all areas: my health, my relationships and my wealth. I am not worthy.
I grew up with an abusive, alcoholic father until the age of 12. We never knew who was coming home from work each day. Would he be angry and throw things around or would he be charming and charismatic? Sometimes his mood would change from hour to hour.
My dad continually called me stupid and told me I was not good enough. If I received a grade of 98%, rather than applaud, he would criticize me and ask why I did not get 100%. I was made to feel like I was “bad” for any small mistake. So, I took on the role of being a perfectionist, perfectly.
I stayed at most of my jobs for 6 years at a time. Excelling in my career, working my way from the bottom to the top in extremely short periods of time became my mode of operation. However, even at the top of the company ladder, I was undervalued and underpaid in my position and several employers had to hire three people to take my place when I left the company.
Once, I had an alcoholic boss who would keep me on pins and needles as to which persona would “show up” to work that day. Was he going to be nice or was he going to be angry at me for something I did not do? I started tracking every conversation via email, just so I had proof that I was doing what I had been asked to do and because I felt a little bit like I was going “mad” wondering if I had misunderstood his requests somehow. My mind was chaotic and my stomach constantly hurt. How did this continually happen? Well, I was constantly finding ways to re-enact my relationship with my dad.
The underlying theme I began to notice was I am not worthy. Not worthy of love, not worthy of feeling protected and safe in a relationship, not worthy of money.
By erasing the belief that I am not worthy, so many things in my life began to change, money being just one of them. As I began to dig deeper, I noticed there are many layers to feeling worthy of money, including our parents view of money, experiences we had as a child that shaped the way we view “rich” people and how we judge people who love money, and our own personal power in relationship to creating and achieving the financial freedom that we desire.
Coming from a household where my older sister’s green corduroy, roller skate patch pocket Goodwill pants were tapered down to fit me once she outgrew them, to being able to comfortably provide my kids anything they need right when they need it. From a childhood living on an unemployment budget and eating corn meal mush for dinner, to owning a gorgeous home with a view, two rental homes and a vacation home while continuing to build a financial picture beyond our wildest imagination.
Are you ready to take your life and your business to the next level? Are you ready to create your highest version of a success story?
As an entrepreneur, realizing your potential, being a natural leader, and feeling confident in what you are doing and how you are building your business is vital. I’d love the opportunity to discuss your personal needs for up-leveling your beliefs, your income and your life!
Please reach out - I am here to serve and support you!