Breaking the Habit of Seeing Yourself the Same Way

Have you ever woken up in the morning and noticed how automatically your routine unfolds? You probably wake up on the same side of the bed, grab your phone or head to the bathroom in the same way, and brush your teeth with the same hand. Joe Dispenza, in his book Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself, explains that these repetitive behaviors are driven by neural pathways ingrained in our brain over time.

But it’s not just our morning routine that unfolds on autopilot. It’s our perception of ourselves, too. We unconsciously rehearse the same stories about who we are, what we’re capable of, and how we fit into the world. It’s not a conscious choice—it’s just how our brain holds onto familiarity.

The Unconscious Habit of Self-Identity

Even after making tangible changes, we may still identify with an outdated version of ourselves. This isn’t because we consciously choose to stay stuck. Rather, our brain naturally clings to what it knows. If you spent years believing you were bad with money, even after saving consistently for a year, you might still feel financially insecure. If you’ve historically seen yourself as unhealthy, two weeks of consistent workouts might not immediately change how you perceive yourself.

These patterns are not just habits of action but habits of thought. Our brains are wired to keep us safe and predictable, so they recycle old stories, even when those stories no longer match reality.

A New Approach to Self-Perception

The good news is that just as habits can be changed with practice, so can self-perception. The first step is awareness—recognizing that the way you see yourself might be outdated. Notice when you catch yourself thinking, "I’m that person who doesn’t exercise," or "I’m always broke." These thoughts might not actually reflect your current reality.

Identity is a Fluid Concept

There’s a moment in the movie Hitch where a character nervously says, “These shoes aren’t really me…” and Hitch replies, “You are a very fluid concept right now. You bought the shoes. You look great in the shoes.”

It’s light and funny—but deeply true. We forget that who we are isn’t fixed. Just like those shoes, the new habits we’re trying on—whether it’s showing up to the gym, saving money, or speaking kindly to ourselves—might feel unfamiliar at first. But they’re already part of us. We chose them. We bought the shoes.

The unfamiliar feeling doesn’t mean something’s wrong—it simply means it hasn’t become second nature yet. The brain clings to the familiar, even if the familiar no longer serves us. Growth means continuing to show up, even when it feels a bit awkward. Eventually, what once felt new becomes your new normal.

How to Break the Habit of Being Yourself:

1. Acknowledge Your Growth: Take a moment to write down three ways you’ve evolved in the last year. Have you become more consistent with self-care? Have you taken steps to improve your finances? Allow yourself to see these positive shifts.

2. Challenge Your Story: When you catch yourself thinking in outdated ways, pause and ask, "Is this true?" Reflect on the evidence that supports the new version of you.

3. Create a New Identity Statement: Instead of repeating old patterns, consciously choose affirmations that match who you’re becoming. For example: "I am committed to my health," or "I am responsible with my money." Say these daily, especially when the old stories creep in.

   
   

Embrace the New Version of You

Transformation isn’t just about changing habits—it’s about changing how we see ourselves. Just like waking up on the same side of the bed, our brains naturally stick to familiar narratives. But when we become conscious of these stories and deliberately choose new ones, we create the space for realizing our authentic growth.

Are you ready to see yourself with fresh eyes? Share one way you’ve grown recently in the comments below! Or DM me to explore how to fully embrace the new you.

Namaste,

Heather